Joy In Alzheimer’s

Prologue

Let’s just be honest; there is no joy in Alzheimer’s; however, Joy, my mom, is in the middle of it….so ‘Joy In Alzheimer’s’ is where we are. This is an attempt to follow her through this unwinnable battle. To open-up about how the mental disease affects her and those who care and love her. So, how did her long journey down a narrowing path come to this point. A path which no longer has a safety net. Where every stumble, on her old uncertain legs and weakened mind, can lead to uncontrolled dementia and deep dark recesses.

Joy’s road, like most with Alzheimer’s, started long before anyone really knew. My dad passed away over 15 years ago and since then Joy has lived alone. My nephew and his family lived nearby for several years. To their credit they reported subtle changes in her mental abilities. Being remote, the rest of the family dismissed the observations as ‘she’s just getting older’. Six years ago, we moved her from her west Texas home of over 50 years to an independent living facility in central Oregon. Now closer, we could see some subtle changes which age alone couldn’t explain. Three falls, with head injury, just compounded the problem. She began to lose the ability to pay bills and her ‘book-keeping’ went from taking a few hours to taking a few weeks.

We took her to a neurologist under the pretext of getting a baseline assessment after her third fall. The appointment went well. The neurologist wasn’t overly concerned with her cognitive test results. The diagnosis changed at the next appointment six months later. The doctor was concerned with the delusional episodes, the money management deterioration, but the illustration below sort of tipped the scales.

Within six months we had moved her to an assisted living facility, before the independent one was forced to ask us to move her. That’s where she is now and has been for over a year and a half; even though she’ll tell you she just moved in and has changed apartments five or six times, and the entire complex has been rotated around several times.

This was the start of our journey with her down that long narrowing path. We have found humor, character, courage, and sadness along the way. I’m sure we will find more as we continue. These will be the stories I tell, and I’m always interested in comments and support as we try to help each other. We are all on journeys and we shouldn’t judge the paths we are all on. We should just extend a hand and help. You never know, you might be the safety net so many of those with Alzheimer’s and those who are their care partners really need.