Tag: Dementia

Joy was an amazing woman, friend, wife, and mother. Her ninety-one years were filled with love for everyone she met, adventure, and a caring spirit right to the end. Joy passed on September 22, 2024. Some of her final words were, ‘I’m the most blessed person in the world.’ We didn’t have the heart to tell her it was us, all of us, whom she made the most blessed just by being her and being part of our lives.

Joy was born in far west Texas in 1933 as the depression was slowing ending. She grew up on a farm/ranch learning to keep everything, ‘just in case,’ and more importantly, acceptance. Her playmates and friends on the ranch and the small school were of mixed races and religions. She imparted her conviction of acceptance to her sons, their friends, and hers.

Joy didn’t just study the Bible; she lived its teachings. She brought her love of people, all people, to the Presbyterian Session and helped guide her church to be inclusive and welcoming, to teach lessons of life, and to be better neighbors. Joy often said she prayed twice because she was so engaged in the church choir.

Joy would often say the only thing she ever wanted to be was a wife and mother. She was terrific at both. She was a dedicated, loving wife. She traveled the backroads of Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and Wyoming, living and starting a family in a trailer with her life partner as he worked the mining fields and mineral exploration projects. These were her ‘nomad’ years, which were at times lonely and hard but mostly filled with adventure and broadening experiences.

To us, she was the best mom and mom to our friends. To her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, she was the best Momo ever. She was always there. She always had a hand to hold when ours were scared and trembling. She always had kind, loving, supporting words, teaching us the lessons she felt she needed to impart. She took all our friends under her wing and gave them the same love and attention she gave us. She opened our home and welcomed anyone who needed a place to stay. She didn’t care about gender, race, or religion; they were our friends, and therefore, they were her extra children, whom she loved.

Joy was an accomplished lady when women weren’t necessarily supposed to be. She earned a teaching degree and worked as a substitute teacher. Then, she returned to college fifteen years later, earning a Bachelor of Science in Library Science. Joy was a fantastic Cub Scout Den Mother. She was instrumental in converting the high school from a PTA to a PTSA because she believed the student’s opinions should be heard. Joy was a religious leader and was one of the first women Deacons and Elders in the local Presbyterian church. Joy strenuously advocated for a new neighborhood hospital and gave testimony before the Texas State Legislature. But Joy was most proud to be on the Board of Directors of the Lee Moor Children’s Home in El Paso. She was a tireless advocate for the children and their future. And Joy was always one who never turned down a glass of wine or a piece of Dove dark chocolate. Cheers, Joy….

Joy knew time with people was more special than any task. She spent time making a friend with everyone and helping whenever she could. Ironically, that helping hand became her downfall. She would be all right with that if she could remember. Joy lived with the idea that if you want to go fast, you go alone; if you want to go far, take someone with you. She took many of us by the hand and took us along on an incredible journey. A person’s reach should be longer than their grasp. Joy’s reach has touched so many far, far, beyond her grasp, and we are all much, so much better because of her. She will never be gone as long as we remember her and tell her stories.

Next up….Epilogue

NeverFearTheDream    #JoyInAlzheimer’s    simplebender.com

_{*This is Joy’s and our journey….what affects her may not be what is, or will, affect you or your loved one. These are our observations and obstacles, if by talking about them helps you; great. Stay well….}